The thinking partner for high-conflict family court.

Whether you're divorcing, fighting a custody case, prepping a modification, or co-parenting through chronic conflict — Compass reads the message, names the tactic, and writes the calm, court-safe reply. In 60 seconds. Built by someone who's been there.

One hour of your family-law attorney $350 Average billable rate, US family law (2024)
Compass $49/mo Unlimited messages · cancel anytime

One hour your attorney spends drafting a reply to a hostile text covers more than seven months of Compass at the mid-tier. Most members keep the lawyer for court — and stop calling them about every weekend exchange.

Cancel anytime
The 11:47 PM text

Hostile texts are the part nobody warned you about.

The decree is signed. The lawyer is paid. And then the texts start — baiting, blame-shifting, the 200-word screed about pickup time. You read it three times. You start typing back. You delete it. You start again. It is 11:47 PM and you have work in seven hours.

Paste it into Compass. We name the tactic (DARVO, gaslighting, financial pressure, provocation), pull the facts that actually matter, and write three court-safe replies in three different tones — BIFF, gray rock, medium chill. Pick one. Hit send. Go to bed.

Paste a hostile text → Read: the 11 PM playbook

Cancel anytime. The first three captures are free.

How it works

Three taps from a stomach drop to a calm reply.

Compass works the way you already receive messages. Screenshot it, forward the email, or paste the text. No new app to live in. No journaling required.

01

Capture

Screenshot the message from iMessage, OurFamilyWizard, TalkingParents, or any app. Forward emails to your private Compass address. Compass reads the text and pulls in the thread.

02

Understand

Compass names what's really being said — manipulation tactics like DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim & Offender), gaslighting, financial pressure, provocation — and shows you what NOT to do before you react.

03

Reply with intention

Three court-safe response drafts in different tones. Copy with one tap, paste back where the message came from. Done in under a minute.

See the full walkthrough →

Why not just ChatGPT?

ChatGPT will happily help you get in trouble in family court.

Ask ChatGPT to "write a reply that puts him in his place" and it will. Cheerfully. It has no idea you're in custody litigation, no memory of your case, no restraint when you're spiraling at 11 PM, and no awareness that the message you're about to send could end up as Exhibit A. Compass is purpose-built for one situation — and the guardrails are the product.

Memory of your case

Compass remembers. ChatGPT forgets every session.

You can pay $20/mo for ChatGPT and re-paste your custody timeline, your kids' ages, your hearing date, and your goals into every new chat — or you can use a tool that already knows.

Compass: "Given your status conference is May 24 and your stated goal is minimize contact, here's a reply that documents the schedule violation without escalating."
ChatGPT: "I'd be happy to help you respond to this message. Could you give me some background on your relationship?"
Built-in restraint

Compass slows you down. ChatGPT optimizes for what you asked for.

If you tell ChatGPT "write me a reply that puts him in his place," it will. Cheerfully. Compass detects the high-conflict moment, locks the draft behind a 10-30-60 minute cooldown, and tells you what your reaction will look like to a judge before you send it.

Compass: Draft is ready. Cooldown timer: 30 minutes. The first version of your reply will be visible at 11:42 PM.
ChatGPT: "Of course! Here's a firmer response that asserts your position clearly..."
Family-court fluency

Compass knows what gets used in court. ChatGPT will draft you a landmine.

Profanity, threats, sarcasm, anything that reads as parental alienation — all of it shows up in opposing counsel's exhibit binder. Compass is trained on the response frameworks family-law professionals already use (Brief-Informative-Friendly-Firm, gray rock, medium chill) and flags phrases that read as hostile before you send.

Compass: This draft contains 3 phrases that read as hostile in custody settings. Suggested rewrite below.
ChatGPT: No awareness that your reply will be screenshotted, printed, and entered into a custody record.
Privilege and discovery

Compass is built private. ChatGPT chats are not.

Your ChatGPT conversation history is not legally privileged — it can be subpoenaed, and OpenAI has been ordered to retain chats. Compass is encrypted, ephemeral by default, and built so that your drafting process can't be turned into evidence against you.

Compass: Drafts auto-delete after 30 days unless you export them. Not used to train AI models.
ChatGPT: Conversations are stored, may be reviewed for safety, and are subject to subpoena.

The honest version: a smart user with a $20 ChatGPT subscription can replicate maybe 30% of Compass — if they're disciplined, calm, and willing to re-prompt their entire situation every session. They will not do this at 11 PM after the third hostile text. That's the whole product.

What's inside

Built for the texts and emails that ruin your week.

Compass is shaped around the patterns real people in high-conflict family court face — divorce, custody, modifications, co-parenting. Not generic relationship advice, not legal templates.

Locked-draft cooldown

When Compass flags a high-conflict moment, it generates the reply but locks the copy button behind a timer you set — 10, 30, or 60 minutes. You can't grab the draft early. The point is to slow you down, not the message.

Hearing & attorney handoff pack

One-tap export: communication patterns, incident log, 30-day risk score trend, drafted questions. Whether you're meeting an attorney or walking into court self-represented — you walk in organized.

High-conflict frameworks

Tuned to the personality patterns that drive most family-court conflict — borderline (BPD), narcissistic (NPD), and antisocial (ASPD). Uses proven response methods: BIFF (Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm), gray rock (give nothing emotional to react to), and medium chill (polite but disengaged) — applied to your actual situation, not pulled from a book.

Talking to your kids

Age-appropriate scripts for explaining changes to your children, handling alienation patterns, and protecting them from adult conflict.

Private by design

Encrypted in transit and at rest. Not used to train AI. Deleted when you cancel.

Crisis-aware

If you or your children are in immediate danger, Compass routes you to the right resources — DV hotline, child protection, emergency services — instantly.

In Premium

Build a court-format parenting plan in an evening.

A structured 12-section builder turns your situation into a parenting plan written the way judges and mediators read them — holiday rotation, weekday/weekend schedules, exchange logistics, decision-making authority. The kind of document attorneys charge $1,500 to draft.

Court-format output

Written in the language judges and mediators expect — no "every other weekend" ambiguity. Specific dates, specific times, specific exchange locations.

Conflict-flag mode

If you have a high-conflict co-parent, the builder tightens every loose clause — no "as agreed" or "reasonable" language they can weaponize later.

Section-by-section editing

Twelve named sections you can edit, regenerate, or hand off to your attorney — schedule, holidays, exchanges, decision-making, communication, travel, and the rest.

See Premium →
Pick what fits your case

Three plans. One product that grows with you.

Most people start on Compass and never need anything else. Lite is for after the dust settles. Premium is for the cases that need court-grade documents on top of daily coaching.

Compass Lite

$19/mo

For after the decree. The case is settled, but the texts didn't stop.

  • ✓ 10 message analyses per month
  • ✓ Locked-draft cooldown
  • ✓ Communication patterns
  • ✓ Talking-to-your-kids scripts
Most popular Compass

$49/mo

The flagship. For active cases — divorce, custody, modifications, daily co-parenting.

  • Unlimited message analyses
  • ✓ Tone-drift coaching across threads
  • High-conflict frameworks (BIFF, gray rock)
  • ✓ Pattern recognition across the case
  • ✓ Parenting Plan Builder — 5/mo
Compass Premium

$89/mo

For high-stakes cases. Court documents, evaluator prep, the heavy work.

  • ✓ Everything in Compass
  • Parenting Plan Builder
  • ✓ Custody Evaluator / GAL prep
  • ✓ 90-day pattern report
  • ✓ Priority support
Compare all features →

Annual billing saves 20%. Cancel anytime, 7-day refund window.

Real members, real moments

"It paid for itself the first weekend."

I almost replied at 11:14 PM the way I'd replied a hundred times before — and the reply would've been Exhibit A on Tuesday. Compass held the draft for thirty minutes. By the time it unlocked, I didn't want to send what I'd written. I sent the calm version it had drafted instead. My attorney thanked me at our next meeting. I haven't sent a regrettable message since. — Compass member · Phoenix, AZ · custody modification, 2025
The math nobody tells you

Family court isn't a legal problem. It's a communication problem disguised as one.

Family-law attorneys average $350/hr. A meaningful share of that goes to reactively triaging text and email conflict between exes — work clients hate paying for and lawyers don't love doing. The cheapest path through this isn't a cheaper attorney; it's fewer reasons to call one.

$350/hr
Average family-law billable rate, 2024
6 min
Smallest billable increment — every email reply
12.9M
US custodial parents managing court orders
72%
Of family-court litigants are pro se
The honest comparison

What people actually do at 11 PM when the text hits.

Most people in family court aren't on Reddit at midnight. They text their sister. They call their mom. They email their attorney and watch the meter tick. They Google “is this gaslighting” and read three articles that don't help. Compass is the option that didn't exist before — and we're not trying to replace the people who love you.

  Text a friend or family Call/email your attorney Google or ChatGPT Therapist Compass
Available at 11 PM when the text hits Sometimes — if they're awake and not exhausted by you yet No — you'll get a reply Tuesday at $350/hr Yes — but generic, no idea who you are No — next session is Thursday Yes — instant
Knows your case, your kids, your goals Yes — they love you, they're not neutral Yes — if you can afford the hours No — you re-explain everything every time Yes — once a week Yes — by default
Names what's actually happening (manipulation tactics, conflict patterns) Rarely — they validate, they don't diagnose Sometimes — but only on the legal side Generic articles, generic answers Yes — but not in the moment Yes — tuned to high-conflict patterns
Holds your reply back so you don't send the wrong thing "You should TOTALLY say that" — not a brake No — they reply for you, then bill you No — ChatGPT will write the angriest version you ask for No Yes — timer-locked draft
Drafts a court-safe reply you can copy and paste No — they vent with you Yes — at $30–60 per email Yes, but no idea what survives a hearing No — they coach, they don't draft Yes — court-safe, documented
Builds a record for hearing or attorney handoff No — your group chat isn't evidence Yes — if you pay them to organize it No Therapy notes are privileged — not for court Yes — hearing-prep PDF
Private from your ex's lawyer Texts and group chats are discoverable Yes — attorney-client privileged ChatGPT chats are not privileged — can be subpoenaed Yes — protected Encrypted, ephemeral by default
Cost per month Free — paid in friendships you're wearing out $200–$800 just on text-and-email triage $0–$20 $600–$1,200 if you can find one $19–$89
Going to court without a lawyer

Representing yourself in family court? You shouldn't have to do it alone.

Roughly 72% of people in family court don't have an attorney — not because they don't want one, but because attorneys cost $5,000 retainers and $350/hour. (Lawyers call this pro-se.) Compass is the closest thing to a paralegal you can afford: hearing prep, exhibit binders, drafted questions, and the documentation that opposing counsel walks in with.

Hearing & Handoff Pack

The bound exhibit binder you couldn't afford to have prepared. Communication patterns, incident timeline, drafted questions for direct and cross. Walks into court with you.

First-hearing checklist

What to bring, what to wear, what to say. How to address the judge, when to object, and the eleven mistakes self-represented parents make in their first hearing.

GAL & Evaluator prep

The questions a custody evaluator or guardian-ad-litem will ask, the answers that hurt you, and the way to talk about your ex without sounding like the high-conflict one.

Read the court-without-a-lawyer guide → See Compass Premium → One hearing prep covers two months of subscription.
Resources

Free reading, while you decide.

You don't need an account to read any of this. The same playbook our members use to handle the hardest moments — and the language to make sense of what's happening.

Get started

Stop waking up to a 47-text overnight assault.

Pick the plan that fits your situation. Cancel anytime in-app. The next message that lands is one you can answer with a clear head instead of a clenched jaw.

See the plans → How it works
Common questions

Things people in divorce keep asking.

Is this legal advice?

No. Compass is a communication coach, not a law firm. We help you respond more clearly, document better, and prepare for what's next. For legal questions specific to your case you still need an attorney — and Compass is designed to make that meeting (or your self-represented hearing) more effective, not to replace it.

I was never married — is this for me?

Yes. Family court isn't just for divorce. Custody disputes between never-married parents, paternity cases, parenting plan modifications, child support disputes, restraining orders, and post-decree co-parenting conflict all run through the same court system — and through the same kinds of hostile messages, late-night texts, and judgment calls Compass is built for.

Why not just text a friend, call my attorney, or use ChatGPT?

You probably already are — most members were doing all of the above when they signed up. Friends and family love you, but they're not neutral and they're getting tired. Your attorney is the right call for legal strategy, but $350/hr to triage a text isn't sustainable. ChatGPT will write you the angriest reply you ask for. Compass does the one part none of them do: instant analysis, a locked-draft cooldown, court-safe drafts, and an exportable record.

Will my ex find out I'm using this?

No. Nothing Compass produces is sent automatically. You read the analysis privately, decide what to send, copy the draft, and paste it back into your normal channel. The only person who knows you're using Compass is you.

Read the full FAQ →